I poured myself a cup of hot coffee, and sat down at the table in the kitchen. The sun was shining and I could feel the warm sun shining in to the kitchen. Roger steps into the kitchen carrying an old book. It is big with a leather cover and raised images on the front. He sits down in the chair next me.
"Rachel" he says, with an Italian accent. He sounds like Massimo from The Wedding planner.
"I need to show you these images in the book."
I sigh heavily. "I have tried. I don't see anything the pages are blank."
"Rachel, just look, I put them in a book, so maybe to help see them."
I open the cover of the book to the first page. there are some words centered in the middle of the page. They are blurry. I pause and try to get my eyes to focus on them. for a moment I can read it. Dedicated to, and in loving memory my Grandmother Bertha.
I turn to the next page. The index.
I turn a few more pages until I get to a page that only says: Chapter 1
I turn the page over. Bob Seger's Turn the Page starts to play from inside the book somehow. I stare at the pages, they look blank to me. ummm.... I see a glimpse of red on the right page and then its gone. On the left page I see blue...like the ocean and a boat, a sailboat, in the ocean. The image fades in and out. on the other page it looks like a drawing or painting. The red dress....it's on a woman. She is sitting on a bench.. in a park, or on a trail. she is looking away, I cant see her face in the picture. I turn to look at Roger...."Ok I can see these two pictures."
"Yes Rachel" as he smooths the page over with his hand .."that is good, look more, can you find the words in the picture? I will get myself a cup of coffee while you look."
I turn and look at the page with the boat. I can barely see the image. I have to keep repeating Boat, boat, boat, in my head to keep the image on the page, or it fades to white. I smooth the page over with my hand. Maybe its the light glare on the shiny page. For a moment I can see writing under the boat in the water. I run my hand over the page again..but its gone.
In a blink I am back in real life. Sitting in the chair in my living room. I get a real cup of coffee, peruse Facebook for a minute, watch my dad play his fishing game...
I can hear Roger yelling at me from the kitchen.
Ok, back to the book.
I sit back down in the chair, in the kitchen next to Roger.
"I've been calling for you." Roger laughs...."I am only kidding ..where you go, I go."
"Can you see the words?" Roger asks.
I stare at the boat picture. It is staying on the page for longer. I can see the details of the water. The fuzzy line where sky meets the sea. I lean in to look closer at the picture.
Roger laughs again. "You do not need to bring closer to you. Maybe imagine it like a zoom on your phone." He pinched his fingers on the page and expanded them ...the picture got bigger.
"Hmm OK let me try."
I look at the boat in the ocean, and reach out and expand the image like I would on my phone. It gets bigger, but blurry, then nothing, its gone. I pinch the image..the boat is back. I try again, slower. There are numbers on the side of the boat. I see for a brief moment what looks like GPS coordinates in the water. hmm...some words mixed in too. M.. comp...s...45
On the boat there is the letter C and then numbers.
Back to trying to see the words in the water... 0645N.
Roger places his hand over the image. "Look at the next page, we will come back to this later."
"OK." I reply.
I look at the other image on the right. The girl is white, thin, with reddish brown hair. She is wearing a red summer dress.
"See if you can read the sign." Roger said.
"I don't even see a sign in the picture." I said.
"You must walk in the image past her to see."
I look over at him, trying hard not to roll my eyes.
"I'm already imagining that I am here in the kitchen with you, now you want me to imagine in an imagination?"
"Yes."
I stare at the picture. next hing I know..I'm standing on the dirt trail.
"Hi" i say to the girl.
She doesn't turn towards me or respond.
"She cannot hear you yet. These are just pictures for now." Roger said.
I start to walk past her. She seems frozen in that spot. I can see the sign now. It's around the bend just enough to not see it from where I was. It's a wooden sign like what you see on hiking trails.
The words are printed white on the board with a brown background. I can't focus on them.
Roger whispers "White River." "That's cheating" I tell him, "I'm supposed to reading it and I can't."
"Yes but you can hear me so well, and I can read it." Said Roger. "It is OK. we will try again in a bit."
I looked back at the girl sitting on the bench frozen in time. and with a deep breath I was back to here. sitting typing the words out onto my computer.
**I have since learned that the letters on a boat are registration. The letters correspond with the state.
** There is a town called White River, and a campground called White River, both here in California.
Photo Credit: Photo by Colton Sturgeon on Unsplash
Sunday, August 25, 2019
Friday, August 9, 2019
Conversations with my Spirit Guide
How these conversations unfold.
Me: um, ok what do I want to know....
Me: Is my name Rachel
Roger: Rolls his eyes and laughs...yes your name is Rachel
Me: Ok, am I twelve
Roger: Obviously...no.
Me: Why isnt the pendulum moving?
Roger: can you not hear me?
Me: I can hear you...
Roger: Then why does it need to move?
Me: But I need proof that you are there...
Roger: um....can you hear me still?
Me: Yes
Roger: *Face Palm* Ok......
Roger: Ask something else..
Me: Ok...um.....um......ummmmmmmmm
Me: Ok...what is your favorite color?
Roger: Really? Purple and Brown
Me: the pendulum didnt move
Roger: no it did not.
Me: Ok...um..will I stay at Brookdale?
Roger: Until when?
Me: idk I guess, stay until I have something else...
Roger: Is that what you want?
Me:..um...yes...
Roger: then that is what it will be *chuckling*
Roger: Ask me something else....something that you want to know, but dont have the answer for..
Me: Will I get the job at Suncrest...
Roger: *Gives me the side eye and starts doing pushups...
Me: When will I meet someone?
Roger: *Sits back down* When you are ready..
Me: When is that?
Roger: Be ready now....
Me: It doesnt feel right....
Roger: That is where we will start...
Me: Ok..........Well there is that panic attack feeling that won't go away..
Photo Credit: Photo by Jen Theodore on Unsplash
Me: um, ok what do I want to know....
Me: Is my name Rachel
Roger: Rolls his eyes and laughs...yes your name is Rachel
Me: Ok, am I twelve
Roger: Obviously...no.
Me: Why isnt the pendulum moving?
Roger: can you not hear me?
Me: I can hear you...
Roger: Then why does it need to move?
Me: But I need proof that you are there...
Roger: um....can you hear me still?
Me: Yes
Roger: *Face Palm* Ok......
Roger: Ask something else..
Me: Ok...um.....um......ummmmmmmmm
Me: Ok...what is your favorite color?
Roger: Really? Purple and Brown
Me: the pendulum didnt move
Roger: no it did not.
Me: Ok...um..will I stay at Brookdale?
Roger: Until when?
Me: idk I guess, stay until I have something else...
Roger: Is that what you want?
Me:..um...yes...
Roger: then that is what it will be *chuckling*
Roger: Ask me something else....something that you want to know, but dont have the answer for..
Me: Will I get the job at Suncrest...
Roger: *Gives me the side eye and starts doing pushups...
Me: When will I meet someone?
Roger: *Sits back down* When you are ready..
Me: When is that?
Roger: Be ready now....
Me: It doesnt feel right....
Roger: That is where we will start...
Me: Ok..........Well there is that panic attack feeling that won't go away..
Photo Credit: Photo by Jen Theodore on Unsplash
Tuesday, August 6, 2019
Together
As I got up from the kitchen table, Roger stood up as well. I felt nervous showing him the time travel train station in my basement. This is the kind of thing that freaks people out. I took a a deep breath and walked over to the door. Today the stairs were brightly lit. For the first time I spoke words while I walked down the stairs. "I painted the scenes on the walls to make it brighter in here" I said to Roger, who was behind me. "I love them" he said quietly, as he gazed up along the walls and the ceiling.
At the bottom of the stairs I heaved the big heavy door open, and stepped aside as I let Roger walk past me into the room. I let the door swing shut, as I stood there in silence.
"There is no train right now." He said.
"Where do you want to go? Do we pick? Or does the train pick for us?"
"It depends on if you have a purpose, or just want an adventure" I replied.
"Which shall we do today?" He asked.
I shrugged my shoulders. "I don't know." I responded.
"A moment in the past has already been lived, and a moment in the future is one of many possibilities. Let us travel to another world." He said. "Let us meet your ancestors."
"Ok" I replied. We stepped up to the platform; we could feel the wind starting to blow gently. Then we could hear the rumble of time and space moving.The tunnel started to light up in blue. With a blast of air the tunnel was filled with bright blue light zooming past us.
Roger grabs my hand, "Come with me I will show you where to go."
We step into the blue zooming light train and immediately step off onto the other side. I look around but everything appears blurred. "Can you see ok?" Roger asked, seeming to know that I could not see.
"It is blurry, everything is really blurry." I said.
"Keep my hand I will lead you." We start to walk and I can feel the ground crunching under my feet. I can see blurry objects moving around me, and I can feel a breeze on my neck. We stop walking. A blurry image stops in front of us.
"This is your Great Grandma Drake" Roger says to me. "I cant see her." I reply.
"Close your eyes." Roger said. "Take a deep breath. Can you hear her?" I shut my eyes and breath in.
"Hello Rachel." Says a crackly old voice. "Yes I heard that." Roger laughs........"you can respond to her. She can hear you and see you."
"Hi Grandma Drake. How are you?" I ask.
"I'm dead." She responds, and her and Roger start laughing. I join in the laughter as well.
"Well, its nice to meet you, I'm sorry I can't actually see you", I say after the chuckles have subsided. "Don't be scared of me, I'm here to help." I can hear the crackly voice say as her voice starts getting quieter.
"Roger I can't even hear her very good" I say to him. he pulls me closer to him, I can feel him lean in next me. "Can you hear me ok? he asked. "Yes, now keep your eyes closed and you can hear her too." "I'm here to help" I can hear her clearly say. "Help with what " I ask.
"Help with......" her words seem to drown out again."
"Thank you Grandma" Roger says. "OK for now" she replied. I open my eyes, everything is still blurry, though I can tell she is not in front on me anymore. I turn towards Roger. "Who else am I going to meet here today?"
"We will come back in a week," Roger says. "Come with me." We walk a little ways, then we step though what looks like a veil.
"Do you recognize this?" Roger Asks. Everything is clear. We are standing at the edge of field with thousands of TVs on stands all playing something different. "Yes, this was from my dream, after the long amount of time walking through the dark woods. My soul showed me that this, would be after that. She said something about how these are all choices and outcomes." I look over at him, thankful I can see him clearly in this light.
"This is what we navigate this week. Together."
Photo credit:Photo by Antonio Grosz on Unsplash
At the bottom of the stairs I heaved the big heavy door open, and stepped aside as I let Roger walk past me into the room. I let the door swing shut, as I stood there in silence.
"There is no train right now." He said.
"Where do you want to go? Do we pick? Or does the train pick for us?"
"It depends on if you have a purpose, or just want an adventure" I replied.
"Which shall we do today?" He asked.
I shrugged my shoulders. "I don't know." I responded.
"A moment in the past has already been lived, and a moment in the future is one of many possibilities. Let us travel to another world." He said. "Let us meet your ancestors."
"Ok" I replied. We stepped up to the platform; we could feel the wind starting to blow gently. Then we could hear the rumble of time and space moving.The tunnel started to light up in blue. With a blast of air the tunnel was filled with bright blue light zooming past us.
Roger grabs my hand, "Come with me I will show you where to go."
We step into the blue zooming light train and immediately step off onto the other side. I look around but everything appears blurred. "Can you see ok?" Roger asked, seeming to know that I could not see.
"It is blurry, everything is really blurry." I said.
"Keep my hand I will lead you." We start to walk and I can feel the ground crunching under my feet. I can see blurry objects moving around me, and I can feel a breeze on my neck. We stop walking. A blurry image stops in front of us.
"This is your Great Grandma Drake" Roger says to me. "I cant see her." I reply.
"Close your eyes." Roger said. "Take a deep breath. Can you hear her?" I shut my eyes and breath in.
"Hello Rachel." Says a crackly old voice. "Yes I heard that." Roger laughs........"you can respond to her. She can hear you and see you."
"Hi Grandma Drake. How are you?" I ask.
"I'm dead." She responds, and her and Roger start laughing. I join in the laughter as well.
"Well, its nice to meet you, I'm sorry I can't actually see you", I say after the chuckles have subsided. "Don't be scared of me, I'm here to help." I can hear the crackly voice say as her voice starts getting quieter.
"Roger I can't even hear her very good" I say to him. he pulls me closer to him, I can feel him lean in next me. "Can you hear me ok? he asked. "Yes, now keep your eyes closed and you can hear her too." "I'm here to help" I can hear her clearly say. "Help with what " I ask.
"Help with......" her words seem to drown out again."
"Thank you Grandma" Roger says. "OK for now" she replied. I open my eyes, everything is still blurry, though I can tell she is not in front on me anymore. I turn towards Roger. "Who else am I going to meet here today?"
"We will come back in a week," Roger says. "Come with me." We walk a little ways, then we step though what looks like a veil.
"Do you recognize this?" Roger Asks. Everything is clear. We are standing at the edge of field with thousands of TVs on stands all playing something different. "Yes, this was from my dream, after the long amount of time walking through the dark woods. My soul showed me that this, would be after that. She said something about how these are all choices and outcomes." I look over at him, thankful I can see him clearly in this light.
"This is what we navigate this week. Together."
Photo credit:Photo by Antonio Grosz on Unsplash
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