Conversation with Future me part 2

I have decided to buy a mobile home instead of a house. This decision has weighed heavily on me because there are some things that having a house allows that just simply are not there with a mobile home. I wanted a dog and a yard for the kids to play. Those are just not going to happen at this time. But I still want to make sure that this was the right choice. I am going to visit my future self to see if we are happy with decision in the future. 

I step off the couch and walk down the stairs, through the double doors. I pause at the Time Travel Train. I need to think about what I want and where I want tot go .  I want to ask my future self whether we are happy with our decision to buy a mobile instead of a house. I close my eyes and think about how far in the future I want to ask. I choose June; mid June. I put my hand out and stick it into the blue light. I leave it there for a moment, thinking about my future self. I open my eyes and step into the blue light. I step out onto concrete. There is a pool there and it is hot outside. I turn, I am sitting at a table by the pool. I walk up to me.
I ask "Are we happy with buying a mobile instead of a house?"
Future me is reading a book and sets it down for a moment. I never actually look up at me.
"At least we have a pool." Future me says.
"Do we like the place?"
"Its nice"
"Are we saving money?"
"Not as much as we wanted to."
"Are the kids happy?" I ask
"Yes..though they don't know what its like to have a house and a yard. I feel like I stole that opportunity from them."
"How is the commute?"
"Its easy."
"Do you regret buying  mobile instead of a house?"
"No, its just hard trying to convince the kids why this is better."
 "Ok thank you" I reply.
"Your welcome." Future me picks up he book again and goes back to reading. I walked to the edge of the concrete and stepped through the thin veil into the blue light and back onto the platform, through the door, up the stairs and back to the couch.

Conversation with future me.

Conversation with future me.


I am not really sure if I need to travel to the future to speak to future me or not. I take a deep breath. I climb off the couch and walk down a flight of stairs. I run my hands along the wood paneling on the walls. I stop at the door at the bottom of the stairs. I think to myself that I need to go just a few moths a head in the future. June in the beginning o June June 3rd. I focus on the date. I pull the heavy door open towards me. I feel the cool whoosh past me. I step onto the platform. The blue train size tube of energy is zooming past me. I look around in the  pictures that are floating in the blue zooming light. The pictures go slower than the light does. I focus on June 3rd 2018 A picture stops in front of me. I can feel the flicker of my mind trying to take over. I stop. I close my eyes. I let the picture go back in the blue light. I let the air continue to blow by me. I put my hand out into the  blue light  I open my eyes. I step into the picture before I can think too much about it it. I am standing at work. I look around I am parked in the same place. It is warm outside. I turn around and step back into the blue light and step onto the platform. ..hmmm what I am wanting to know from future me is if I bought a house, or mobile, or nothing and stayed in my apartment. I take another deep breath. I think to myself and ask.... I need to know which one I chose.  I step back in to the light. I am at work again. I am standing outside my car. Future me is in my car on her phone...probably scrolling through Facebook. The car is on and the window is rolled up. Future me answers without looking up from the phone "..Why do you need to know?"
 "I want to stop stressing about it now" I reply.
"We get a house."
 "Is it what we wanted?" I ask.
 "Mostly."
 "What is wrong with it?"
 "Its small, but we are making it work." Future me sighs.
 "Do we regret it?"
 "A little."
 "Should I buy a place or not?"
 "Maybe it will be better further in the future" future me says.
"Should I try more for a mobile?"
 "I dont know .."
"Is the house close to here?"
 "Close to school. Not here."
 "If I buy a mobile will I change the future?"
 "I guess that is how it works."
 "Ok thank you.."
"Yup. no problem."
 "You don't seem happy."
 "I hate this job remember...haha"
"Oh yea I forgot."
 I turn and step back into the blue light and I am back on the platform. I open the door, walk up the stairs to my couch.

Thank You

So my sister says I should write a letter to my future partner.........lol I am doing this for her ...ahaha



Thank you for being you. Thank you for standing against racism with me. Thank you for understanding why I kneel for the anthem, and kneeling with me. Thank you for going on road trips with me and letting me sing with all the songs. Thank you for understanding what rape culture is and not participating in it. Thank you for going hiking with me, and going to the gym just so we can burn enough calories to go to a food festival. thank you for always finding humor in hard times. Thank you for loving and accepting my family even though they are not normal by society standards. Thank you for being my vault of my thoughts, fears, and dreams. Thank you for being a role model for my children. Thank you for showing them how to love a woman selflessly and respectfully. Thank you for showing me what love trully feels like. Thank you for being my best friend that I will always choose to be around above and beyond anything else. Thank you for giving me space to feel emotions and not marginalizing them. Thank you letting me love you with my whole soul. Thank you for wanting to learn how to rock climb with me..... and being willing to participate in everything that we can learn together. Thank you for staying true to you, and forcing me to stay me as we walk side by side through life. I might not ever meet you in this life time. But I love you anyway, wherever you are. I will still be true in the next life too. I would rather be alone than with someone other than you.

Love, Me